Chapter 211: The Absurdity of Earth

King Amethyst, still perched casually on the shoulder of the massive King of Darkness, waved a hand at the shimmering young girl who represented the System.

"Yes, where was I? Let’s see..." said Amethyst, focusing on the console before him. "I understand now, you really are quite interesting. What I don’t understand is what race you are. Let’s see... they call themselves Humans... from the planet Earth??"

Amethyst paused, tapping his glowing purple eye. "What the hell is Earth? Isn’t that like, dirt? Why would you call yourself Earth? And I don’t understand where you are..."

Amethyst began scrolling through the data in his mind, his features screwing up in distaste. "Solar System? What the hell is that? Let’s see where you really are... Mmm, none of this works. Such absurd information. Such terribly primitive celestial maps... The designations are completely illogical, the vectors are inverted... Seriously, even a two-year-old from the Pleasure Realm could draw a better constellation than this shit! These charts don’t account for temporal drift or gravitational signatures past the fourth sphere! It’s baffling!"

Amethyst continued to rail against the uselessness of the data, his voice full of theatrical indignation, wandering through increasingly abstract concepts. He complained about the lack of proper stellar classification, the absence of coordinates for migrating constellations, and the utter disregard for charting ’forgotten’ or ’lost’ sectors—knowledge that was apparently foundational to his divine comprehension of space.

Ethan wanted to retort, to defend his planet’s science, but he simply lowered his head. He didn’t even understand the concepts Amethyst was complaining about; the divine being was talking about celestial measures, intergalactic distances, surrounding constellations, migratory constellations, and even forgotten or lost constellations. Since he didn’t know what any of that meant, he just looked down and smiled with bitter irony.

Amethyst spun around on the giant’s shoulder, facing Ethan. "I’m sorry, little friend, for speaking ill of your planet," said Amethyst, though he didn’t sound very sorry. "But all this is truly absurd. If you saw what real celestial maps look like—maps that track the flow of light across epochs—you would understand why this information makes absolutely no sense."

Amethyst resumed his analysis, his expression distant. "After reviewing everything, I think I know where we are. If I recall correctly, I was here at some point. It was during a regrettable layover..." He trailed off, his eyes momentarily glazing over with a memory. "I slept with some tasty dark-skinned women and many fair-skinned ones... Mmm, they do have quite beautiful women, I will grant them that, although the planet itself was really ugly... There was nothing but endless plains, and the cold zones were almost dead, and the deserts were the same. Perhaps the jungles and forests were prettier. A very strange, desolate place for a vacation" said Amethyst.

After a torrent of technical complaints, King Amethyst finally stopped his rant.

"I understand what happened and how my beacon got here," said Amethyst, snapping his fingers. "The strange thing is why it traveled so far. If I recall correctly, I got here from a singularity, mmm, or something you call a wormhole."

Amethyst frowned, calculating something. "Why did it come this far? There should be descendants of mine much closer to the Amethyst Realm..."

Ethan was instantly thrown into shock upon hearing that word. Descendant? "Descendant?" stammered Ethan. "Descendant of such a powerful being? What kind of absurd joke was this?"

Amethyst turned his attention to the little girl standing on the table, his purple eyes narrowing. "Hey, did you not tell him why he was chosen?" asked Amethyst.

The young girl, the System avatar shifted her shimmering dress. "I didn’t want to reveal too much, Master," said the girl. "There’s something watching us. I can feel it. I’ve been hiding as much as possible to prevent the King of Darkness from tracking us..."

"Impossible!!" screamed Amethyst, his charming facade fracturing with pure, cold fury. "He should have died with the explosion of the Amethyst Realm! The impact was instantaneous; nothing could survive a blow of that magnitude! Do you know how much it cost me to build that exterminator artifact..."

"I know, Master, I know," said the girl, her expression still innocent despite the gravity of her words. "It’s regrettable, but we can’t do anything. Apparently, he survived and is tracking us. I could vaguely sense that he found our location when I activated, but I quickly hid all traces, so we should be safe for at least a little while longer."

Amethyst let out a frustrated growl. He instantly teleported from the King of Darkness’s shoulder to the seat right next to Ethan.

"Perhaps I should explain that," said Amethyst, collecting his composure. "Mmm, how to put it to you? The beacon—that little cylinder I sent—was supposed to search for a descendant of mine. Well, well, perhaps I got ahead of myself. Mmm. You see, after that explosion you just witnessed, I was teleported to a hidden laboratory I had prepared in case of emergency. I thought the King of Darkness had died, and also that damn cursed bastard whore daughter of a bitch...!!"

Amethyst’s perpetual smile vanished, replaced by a contorted mask of pure, insane rage. He screamed the profanities, his voice echoing violently in the vast chamber. "That treacherous serpent! That ungrateful, miserable, despicable piece of filth! She dared to betray the God of Pleasure himself! I will find her, and I will make her pay for every single destroyed pleasure, every single lost delight!"

He suddenly seized control of himself, inhaling sharply and resuming his seductive pose. "Alright, alright, pardon me," said Amethyst, smoothing his tunic and offering a charming, if brittle, smile. "I got carried away, I apologize. I was saying, after I thought I assassinated them, I hid in that place. I was severely wounded and used all the resources I had, and still couldn’t heal my body completely. So, I decided to create a legacy for my descendants and leave them the mission of rebuilding the Amethyst Realm."